So sorry, but things aren't going as originally planned. I'm busy, that's what? Oh, you didn't say anything. Cool. Anyway, the fourth installment of the month in the "versus" series is coming. It'll be next week. It needs more work. Think of it as a holiday surprise!. So this week, I'll just check in with you all. There is another Monday coming up, so I'm not worried. It's Memorial Day, but you don't need me to sit here and man-splain to you about how a calendar works. You get enough of that from the conservative liberal agenda on TV.

Don't be super jealous, but I just got back from Miami. I know, right? Liquid sunshine and liquid moonshine, that's what I say. I was there to see the iHeartRadio Summer Pool Party. My dumb brother won tickets over the radio or something. So we flew to Miami for the weekend and hung out at the Fontainebleau Resort. If you take all of the vowels out of that name, its just Fntnbl. But, I digress. It was everything I dreamed of and more. I definitely heart radio. It was sweet to hang by the beach, hang by the pool, and touch Flo Rida's sweaty arm. The risk of Mersa is worth it, I think. I ain't afraid of no staff (infection). The concert was one of the best I've ever been to, even when they threw inflatable pool toys onto the audience. Like big, heavy, four-person inflatable pool toys, ones that would knock your phone and your beer out of your hands. I knew a lot of the songs, which always makes it better. Not that I go to concerts where I don't know the songs, but still.

Once that drain on my wallet ended, I realized that I was feeling the burn. No, not voting for Bernie Sanders, actually feeling my sunburn. All the aloe in the world can't fix this red skin. My skin is so red (how red is it?), it's so red that it plays football for Washington, D.C. (Ba dum tsssss) This always happens. I guess I burn easy. You know what they say; if you can't stand the heat, get out of the sun.

So that's about it. I'll update you on my New Year's Resolutions below. Let's get to the summerin', that my motto right now. Peace!

1. Make a sweet Catch Me If You Can reference. (Completed)

2. Be a guest on someone else's podcast (Completed)

3. Release more episodes of my own podcast. (Completed - 5th is being released whenever)

4. Write a TV show pilot. (2 in progress)

5. Write a play.

6. Take sketch writing classes. (Completed 2)

7. Join an independent improv team. (Completed)

8. Join an independent sketch team.

9. Write my own sketch show.

10. Act in a sketch show.

11. Host an open mic.

12. Do a feature set of stand up.

13. Attend a live taping of Saturday Night Live. (Completed - Hell Yeah!!)

14. Release a book.