Mosquitoes Bite!
I'm itching to get something off of my chest. Actually, it's more like both ankles, my left leg, and both arms. It would appear as though mosquitoes find me almost as delicious as old people did when I was a baby. All I have to do is merely open a door to the outside and the mosquitoes are on me like white on rice. I'm not worried about diseases, since I Googled mosquito bites on Web.MD and found that its probably cancer. Maybe. The thing is, I'm really itchy. Yeezus Christ, they got both ankles and arms. I didn't even stand a chance. Never saw them coming. Or going. Missed them both times. Sneaky cold blooded blood suckers. Screw them.
I don't mean to seem so angry about mosquitoes, but it's annoying. I read this Twitter post recently that cheered me up, though. It was:
"I killed a mosquito in my room last night, and I fear that, for the rest of my life, I'll always be chasing that high."
I can't say who wrote it, but I bet people say he's funny.